I asked her to take Turner back home with her for a bit because the contractions were taking most of my focus. So they headed out and I started to doubt my decision because I knew I wanted Turner home if I were having the baby. But I knew he would have a lot of fun at Amaw D's house and I didn't want him to worry about me.
So 6:15 rolled around and though Troy was doubtful that I was in labor, I didn't see how it could be anything but labor, things were getting serious! So I asked him to call our midwife, Connie, and she said she would head out right away. Doubts were bouncing around in my head and making me wonder if I really was in labor. Would I get the midwife to make the 45 minutes drive in rain and traffic only to still be 1-2 centimeters dilated and having false labor? But I knew I needed her there and I wanted the extra support, so I felt pretty good about calling her.
She arrived at 7:15, immediately checked to see how dilated I was and I was an EIGHT! "Thank you, Lord!" I got emotional because I thought that if I was still at a 1-2 that I wouldn't make it through labor.
Cathy, the other supporting midwife arrived a few minutes after Connie and then my mom and dad got here soon after that. I came out of my room to welcome each of them with a smile. I'm sure at that point they each doubted whether or not I was in labor. But I was! Everyone was in their place, I was in well established labor, and I knew I was going to meet my new baby that night!
I gave myself a pep talk and convinced myself that I could make it until 1am. That was my goal, that was my focus. I knew I could hold it together for that long.
I received my IV antibiotic for group B strep, it only took about 10 minutes and we were off and running! It was kind of surreal and funny because the IV bag was hanging on my bed post. It was the only hint of a hospital or medication or "treatment" of any kind. Pregnant women aren't sick and hospitals are for sick people! It felt so normal to be having a baby at home in the comfort of my own tranquil beautiful master suite.
Troy talked to me throughout the birth and pushed on my back. Mom tickled my shoulders (yum!) while I squatted in the tub and she massaged my back when I was out of the water. We listened to music and chatted and joked in between contractions.
Tillman didn't want to engage in my pelvis so I was "stuck" at 8 centimeters for about an hour. I felt pushy from about 8 centimeters on because I had a big bulgy bag of waters (as I did with Turner as well). This also caused the little lip of cervix because that pressure caused some swelling when it came time to really push. So at my request, they broke my bag of waters and I immediately felt better and less pushy. Some women can push the baby out in the bag of waters, but I have this super tough bag and I don't think it would ever break on its own or come out, so for me, I think it's necessary to break it manually. Some Bradley people might disagree, but I feel this is what's best for me and my babies. In both cases, the bag of waters was broken for less than 30 minutes before the baby arrived, so it wasn't too hard on the baby and it didn't leave the baby exposed to GBS for very long at all.
We tried several different positions, including lunging in the bath tub and on the floor. Then Connie used a rebozo which is a long piece of fabric used in many other countries to help laboring mothers. In my case she wrapped it around my abdomen while I was on my hands and knees on my bedroom floor. She gently shook my abdomen in between contractions and it was surprisingly relaxing. A few minutes later, after my midwives suggested I lay on my side, Troy remembered that was how we got Turner to engage when he was born. Finally, they had me lay on my side putting pressure on my stomach in order to get him in the correct position. Sure enough, that did the trick! I flew from 8 centimeters to fully dilated.
Sidenote: Our halfy, Jessica Knight, my cousin-half sister (because our dads are identical twins) came over unexpectedly. I was excited to see her but nervous that she wouldn't be able to handle witnessing a birth at age 20. She arrived when I was on my hands and knees being jiggled by the rebozo, she laughed and said "Oh, that's cute, Kris." Leave it to her to insult me when I'm trying to push a human out of my body! But she shot the whole birth video on the FlipCam like a champ. She cheered me on during contractions. I remember her mentioning afterward that all of the birth videos I made her watch paid off, she wasn't scared a bit and she saw it ALL! She also managed to send Shannon and Ryan updates, play-by-plays and action shots of what was happening. She enjoyed every minute of it and I'm so glad she was there. That is a bonding experience like no other, a once in a lifetime experience for us both! I'm not encouraging her to look into midwifery, or animal midwifery since she's now an Ag major at Texas A&M. Whoop for her and Aunty Shanty!
I quickly got back in the bath tub to continue laboring. I continued to lay on my side and when I was ready to push I sat up and held on to my legs while Troy held my back up so that I could stay upright but relaxed. Troy was literally perched up on the back of the bath tub for the last half hour of the birth or so. I may have ran a marathon, but Troy at least got the equivalent of a tough yoga session in!
I had a small lip of cervix and when Cathy got in there to push back the lip, then I literally felt Tillman slide down the birth canal. His head was out and I was so grateful to be SO close to meeting my baby!
His head had been in the water for 2 minutes and so to be cautious they decided to pull me out of the water (the amniotic fluid in the lungs prevent a baby from breathing in until their chest passes through the birth canal and the fetal Heimlich maneuver takes place). It wasn't hard to get out of the tub, but it wasn't pretty either! They figured he either had a cord or a shoulder keeping the rest of his body from coming out.
Sure enough, there was a tight cord on his neck that was stuck on his shoulder. So Connie applied pelvic pressure for a few seconds which got his shoulder out and that immediately released the cord. He was here!
They laid him on my stomach and he was such an angel! He didn't want to cry at first, but that was probably because he had come out so quickly. They later told me that I only pushed for SIX minutes. Wow, I'm good! So after a minute or so of talking to him and stimulating him with our hands, he began to cry and pink up. I asked if he was okay and was assured when both Cathy and Connie said he was fine. Little did I know that my mom was panicking and holding her breath until she heard him cry (my tough mama went soft when she saw her baby coping with labor and working so hard to bring her own little baby into the world, but I hope one day she will cherish the experience and be glad that she was there)! My midwife told us that most of their babies do not cry at all, but she was stimulating him with a towel since we were concerned. Several people since have told her since that it's completely normal for a home birth baby not to cry because there are so many factors that are different from a hospital birth (born into the water is an easier transition for the baby, the hospitals try to make them cry, the quick delivery from not being flat on my back, born into a warm environment and not a freezing hospital room, etc.).
As soon as he started crying, he was bright pink and awake and looking around. He was so CUTE! I said he looked like Spike, the dinosaur from The Land Before Time because he kept sucking on his bottom lip (it's better than who I thought Turner looked like...the monster from the Goonies).
He had some bruising on his forehead from being pushed up against my cervix for the hour or so that I was stuck at 8 centimeters, (mom's best friend Linda King asked if I'd had an affair with a smurf...ha) but that was completely gone by day 3.
So there were many similarities between Turner's birth and Tillman's. It's clear there are several things I need to bring to the attention of my next midwife if we have another baby (the need to break my bag of waters, the need to lay on my side to help the baby engage, the lip of cervix that will need to be moved out of the way manually, etc).
Overall it was an amazing birth experience. Even though my mom was freaked out, Troy didn't get to catch Tillman as we had planned, and I didn't get the "pretty" water birth I had imagined (I was not in the least bit disappointed that he was born on the bathroom floor, even though it wasn't the most flattering position for me to be in, I was open to giving birth to him wherever I ended up), it was an incredible birth experience! I could not have asked for anything more!
From start to finish I was in labor for about 8 hours, only 4 of those took concentration and a real physical effort. The last 30 minutes were intense (as is to be expected with a birth) and overwhelming, but the hours leading up to it were calm and peaceful as I worked to bring baby Tillman into the world. Tillman was perfect and beautiful and as mellow as I had expected. At the risk of sounding trite and pious, we are so very very very blessed!
As I said when I went into labor, when he crowed, and when he was born, THANK YOU GOD, THANK YOU LORD!
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